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September 24 - NYC Hello to all you good folks, I am just returning from three days in New York, or should I say Brooklyn, NY. I was hired by Doug Derrybery to do a recording session. As a traveling musician, I am on lots of planes. I fly at least 2 to 3 times a month. And you can count on at least one funny moment on these flights. I think this is an all time classic. I am flying on American Airlines, one of my favorites. American is very musician friendly, unlike Delta, America West and Continental. I never have to worry about my guitar on American. I arrive at the airport and get past security with no problem. I am ready to fly to NY:-) Because I have so many frequent flyer miles I am allowed to board the plane after the first class group. Again, I am happy:-) I get to my seat, my guitar is secure in the over head, my other luggage is at my feet. I am happy:-) Now, I must let you know. I love old people, my parents are old. I would not like to travel with my parents, but I love them;-) As the plane starts to fill, I notice that 75 to 80 percent of my fellow travelers are much older than me:-) In fact, these people can hardly walk. What the heck? Am I on the right flight? Did I get on a charter plane? People are trying to find their seats, but they can't see the seat numbers. I become a flight attendant. The aisles are backed up, and these people need help. I start pointing out seats, one woman cannot lift her bag into the over-head bend. I offer my help, thinking that the bag will be heavy. To my surprise, it weighs less than a loaf of bread. I am in the twilight zone. I love old folks:-) The real flight attendants are running around trying to get everyone seated so that we may leave on time. The plane is packed, at this moment I realize that this is an Ipod flight. I get my music and head-phones ready. I am going to try to block out this 5 and 1/2 hour flight. I am trying to sleep. But everytime I doze off, the nice man (old dude) next me has a question. At one point I want to stick a screwdriver into my ears. And on top of that, every 30 minutes came the toilet run:-( Please stop the madness. By the time the plane landed in NY, I was a mess. Everyone on the plane was nice, but come on! They were all on a tour package. I cannot imagine this group making much ground. I mean most could hardly move. But hey, God bless them all. Now, having said all of that, let me tell you about karma. I could not wait to get away from this group. All the while, I was kicking my own butt for not giving these people a break. I should have just sat back and dug on the scene. But no! I had to think bad thoughts. I was supposed to take a taxi into Brooklyn. As I was walking to the taxi stand, I was approached by a gypsies cab driver. Thinking that it would be the cheapest way to go, I accepted the offer of a ride in that cab. For those that don't know what gypsie cabs are, I will tell you. A gypsie cab is not recognized by the governing body of NYC. It is a private citizen trying to make money with his car. The guy was nice enough, and the ride was smooth and quick. I get to my destination and pay the driver, gather my things and go to the door of my............................Bed and Breakfast! (yikes) I am staying at a Bed and Breakfast - no cable, no ESPN, no HBO (how will I survive?) No private bathroom (Holy Stinky Poo Batman). But that is not the kicker. I left my phone in the car.... Yes! Sport fans, I am stupid.... Somehow, I am without my phone, it is the end of the world. I know that someone on the plane read my thoughts and put a curse on me:-( This is not good. I feel lost and naked, well at least lost. I call my Verizon. I am told that I will have to file a police report, in order to use my insurance. What? I think the police have more important things to do than take a report from some dummy that has lost his phone. I am not going to waste their time. I ask for a location of the nearest store. I will go before the session tomorrow. Now, I don't know about you. But I am not great with directions unless there is a landmark involved. If you had me a map that says go east or west or north, I am lost. Well, Doug gave me a map with directions to the studio. But it says, go north or whatever. I start out walking like I'm Davey Crockett or Daniel Boone. After two blocks, I am lost and wandering around Brooklyn clueless. But, I am a man and what does that mean? It means that I won't ask anyone for directions:-) That's right, I am too proud to ask which way is east. So, I walk. Up, down, up, down and up again. It is hot and humid, I am sweating like a straight man in a bath-house;-) It takes me an hour to find the studio, it is only 4 blocks from my B&B. But, I feel good about myself (this is really stupid). Oh! back to the phone. It took me two days to get a new phone and I had to pay full retail for it. I am sure that my karma cost me $200.00 for the phone plus an hour of walking around the streets with no idea of where to go. And I spent three nights in a B&B. I don't like B&B's.:-) At least the recording session turned out great and in the end, is what the trip was about. My flight home was great and there were the normal amount of older travelers on board;-) So remember, if you find yourself in a similar situation. Remain calm and don't have bad thoughts. You don't want karma coming back on ya. Peace, JV Foggybottom
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